Praying for My Father

I had to rush my father to the ER Tuesday morning. I thought he was having a stroke. My grandmother called me and told me that something was wrong with him, he was very confused and he couldn't see or stand. When I got to the house he was in the fetal position on the couch, he kept saying "I don't know whats wrong, I couldn't remember your name or your number, help me...help me"

I tried to get him to squeeze my hand to signify if he had lost use in his hands (he said he couldn't see out of one eye and one hand was curled up {a sign of stroke}) but he wouldn't acknowledge me. I got him up, and rushed him to the ER. (my grandmother screamed at me when I tried to call for an ambulance--shes insane--my father doesn't have insurance so she thought about the COST UGH) when I got to the ER the nurse asked him the date, the year, where he was...he looked around and all he could say was that he was "with Elizabeth and that he was ok". When they got him back he kept asking me where he was and what was going on. He was crying in pain. Literately CRYING...screaming practically. It was so terrible.HIS EKGs and CAT scans showed that it was the onset of a stroke, that he had previous "activity" (like he had had minor strokes or heart attacks already in the past and not known about them) but that morning he had an anxiety attack that was brought on by the extreme amount of pain that he lives with ...daily. They ended up giving him 8 mg of morphine and 2 ativan. [morphine is distributed depending on weight and pain in doses between 1-4 mg. so he had the maximum both times.] He was in so much pain. I just sat there beside him and held him and cried. It was so sad. He at times didn't even know I was in the room with him. He would talk to me as if I were a stranger.

He is fine now. I suppose. I mean he is still weak, really tired, pale and extremely confused about the other day. He only remembers coming home and staying with me. (I brought him home to my house that night to stay) :-(

I've spent the past couple days with him at his house trying to keep an eye on him, making sure he's eating (he's lost all of his appetite) and not having to do too much. Also the kids being around him keeps him so happy.

praying.

Follow Your Heart-A Small Taste of The Love Dare

WHY Is Following My Heart Not Enough?

I have been reading a book called The Love Dare. It is from the new movie Fireproof. I really want to share a portion of this book that has completely moved me.
"Whatever you pour your time, money and energy into will draw your heart."

HE WHO TRUSTS IN HIS OWN HEART IS A FOOL, BUT HE WHO WALKS WISELY WILL BE DELIVERED. [Proverbs 28:26]

Whats Wrong With Following My Heart?
It's Foolish. The world says "Follow your heart!" This is the philosophy of new age gurus, self-help seminars, and romantic pop songs. Because it sounds romantic and noble, its sells millions of records/books. The problem is that following your heart usually means chasing after whatever feels right at the moment whether or not it actually is right. It means throwing caution and conscience to the wind and pursuing your latest whims and desires regardless of what good logic and counsel are saying.

Proverbs 23:17 Do not let your heart envy sinners yet we struggle to "keep up with the Jones'" - or we allow our daughters to wear "what Britneys' wearing" (venting sorry) I'm sooo at fault here(self admitted sinner raising hand!!)..BUT I'm not exactly pushing the mini on my 2 year old, but nonetheless I must look at myself in the mirror each day and know the sins I commit and WHO I must answer to.

This book goes on to answer the question...

Why is Following My Heart Not Enough?
Because our hearts are so subject to CHANGE and so utterly untrustworthy, the Scriptures communicate a much stronger message than "follow your heart." The Bible instructs you to LEAD YOUR HEART. This means to take full responsibility for its condition and direction. Realize that you do have control over where you heart is. You have been given the power by GOD To take your heart off one thing and to set it on something else. {verses in the Bible that communicate a message of leading your heart: Prvbs 23:17, Prvbs 23:19, Prvbs 23:26, 1Kings 8:61, John 14:27, James 4:8, James 5:8, Ecc 10:2 ...}


in a nutshell...(for those of you reading this like what in the world? {read it twice you might "get it"} You see that new pair of shoes that just came out...you HAVE to have them...you LOVE them....YOU WANT them...you NEEEEEED them...but at what cost will you go for them to be yours? WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE?) I personally have to spend more time in prayer, and focusing on whats here right beside me now...tweedle dee and tweedle doo. What are you going to focus on?

(portions of this blog post were copied from "The Love Dare" written by Stephen & Alex Kendrick)

A Peaceful Prayer for Paps.

*(this picture is from this Christmas 09)*

Clints grandfather is in the hospital. I've wrote about him before, honestly not enough. But I'm terrible with posting all the pictures I take.

Years ago, when Clint and myself first started dating and I first went into nursing I took care of his grandmother Evelyn. A beautiful strong heart woman. Paps her other half was an ex marine drill Sargent. The entire family "warned me" how tough he was. Not intimidated I went in head first. I was raised by a very stern hand in a house with a Navy Seal. No child spoke out of turn. Now at first you would think Paps ran the show. Being his rank and all. WRONG. Shortly after staying with them, coming in everyday I knew what went on behind the scenes. It was "Ma-Ma" that was in charge, She held his heart and they both had mine. They had that old everlasting love.

Evelyn passed in the summer of 2005 right before Clint and myself got married but Paps was there and boy was he sharp looking. The marines never left this man. He was up with the sun and sometimes before. 4:30 everyday dressed and bed made. Even till last week (he came over to our house last Sunday) he's always dressed and shoes shined. 89 years old on Feb. 11th.

(*this picture from 5/10/07 post but it was from an earlier visit in 4/07*)

Last night he was admitted to the hospital. At first they thought he had too (same as Evelyn) congestive heart failure. But just now I got the call that its leaking valves to his pacemaker. This is worse. If it were congestive heart failure medications could be giving to prolong his life and keep fluid off his heart and out of his body; with the leaking valves the only way to fix this would be through surgery and at his age this is not an option. They said that overnight they have drained over 15 lbs of fluid out of him. From the waist down he has... well whats best described as elephantitis. Everything including his genitalia is extremely enlarged. He has refused to eat and is now refusing to even get up making moving the fluids harder.

I pray that he can pull through this. I know if its his time then there is no reason in me asking for the Lord to prolong the inevitable for my own selfish reasons, but I really want the kids to have just a few more years to enjoy Paps. Hes such a gem. (shouldn't I be over 60 to say that?) You know what I mean. . . hes just so special. If this is his time then I ask that the Lord takes him to see his love as peacefully as possibly.

I want to end this post with the song I melt too every time I hear it on the radio. I think of Trent and Evelyn....

Mark Shultz Walking Her Home....

I think about Paps sitting in MaMas room while she was in the Hospice bed, where I got a job to be with her in her final days. Till her final day. He would leave each night when I would get off work at 7. Then each morning when I'd come in at 7 he would be there waiting for me to get there before he went in. Every day she was there (for only a few weeks) he spent every moment he could in the recliner beside her. ♥

***to see pictures of Paps and the kids just click on my labels under Paps!***

The PURPOSE behind NOT blogging this week.

I chose to keep the previous post up for this week for a couple reasons;

Awareness, so many women have gone for years through pain and unknowingly let their doctors tell them that its nothing, "try a new position", "change your diet", "its just a cyst it will pass"....and only about 30 percent have the courage to change their doctor and GET A SECOND OPINION!

Looks can be deceiving, take the time to listen to others because I promise your problems might not always be so bad. Pay attention to those around you, be perceptive to others in need. If you see someone that appears in pain, even if you don't know them, help them. Many times I've struggled to get out of a store with both kids (or even 3) and a cart full of groceries and a buggy goes one way and a kid goes another. Meanwhile a woman or man will just walk right by too high and mighty to help or just to into what their doing. Know that just because someone looks capable maybe just maybe their not. I'm young and appear healthy yet I'm debilitated in many aspects. SO many things I can't do that years ago I wouldn't have hesitated in an instant to do.

God. I left this post here to let you know that I know that I don't stand alone. I have my family and friends, but I stand firm that the Lord is with me every step of this journey. Throughout life we get older and weaker but as this happens our minds rippens we become wiser and hopefully most of us become spiritually richer.

Don't worry be happy. LET GO LET GOD! see me? I'm IN PAIN. YET....~~~~> STUPidly HAPPY. psst. it comes from the inside. my heart is joy filled. (I promise its taken alot to get to this point in life, it DOES NOT come over night. Alot of talking with the Lord.) Surround yourself with positive people. Regardless the circumstances in life at some point there will be pumps in the road, nothing better to get over those bumps then good strong HAPPY people holding your hand! HERE TAKE MINE! lol

*YES my head IS that big (& my mom had me auu natural thannnk u very much!)*

Be thankful. Praise the Lord for what you have. OR for what you DON'T have. Be thankful for those who help you in your time of need. I don't mind speaking out. When I had my last surgery (I had a lap. done when Mason was 14 months old to diagnose me with endo.) I was so appreciative for all the people at my church who reached out to helped us. I'll be honest I was struggling. I didn't ask for help I didn't know how too. I didn't know what I was going to do. Clint had never cooked for us before, never done laundry...well let me rephrase that he had at that point thrown some oily work clothes on top of some whites and pulled the knob. (so thats doing laundry right? lol) but I didn't know how I was going to get by.
The surgery I THOUGHT was scheduled for December 16. Little did I know that it was only 2 days after we returned from our beach trip to Ocean Isle. :-/ I am SO blessed that a friend from church happened to call the day we got back to see how the trip went, then I told her about the surgery she IMMEDIATELY sent out a church wide email for food to be delivered and childcare for Terri while Clint worked each day. She did this with my tonsillectomy surgery last November as well. (she is such a life saver I know) but without her and all the others at the church who knows how it would have turned out but ya know...I'm sure somehow...it would have. HE always provides.

[psssst....I'm lost in my own rambling] ha haa

Oh I remember what I wanted to say....take life one day at a time. SO what if the laundry doesn't get done today, who cares if you don't get to mop on your Thursday schedule (I mop on Thursdays you guessed it) I say grab some DVDS, take out and sweats and snuggle in the bed with the kids. CRUMBS AND ALL!! [not I hate crumbs] get a quilt and lay on top of the comforter. If you work do all this after work. There's ALWAYS Saturday. YES I know there's a bi-gillion other things you have to do on Saturday...hey whats one more? Take the time to spend with your loved ones because your not promised tomorrow.

My best friend almost found this out yesterday and now shes' in the ICU burn unit with her husband. She called me yesterday morning and said that her husband was electrocuted. He works for duke energy and he's a line man. He was air lifted to Winston Salem so I drove her. We spent the day there.... He IS ok. I mean its a serious miracle that he's alive. He will loose a couple fingers on his left hand and the electricity that flew threw his body bypassed his heart and literately exploded out his right hand. [he has a HUGE round 3rd degree burn and hole] the currant has to have an entrance point and an exit point. (they're doing surgery on his hands today...besides the impact from the fall, minor scraps and burns, the burns his hands are the worst.)
Hes an ex marine and hes a TUFF guy for sure...as soon as he regained consciousness he was ready to go home. he said "ok just cut off the fingers, I don't use my pinky much anyways." what a nut. but hes a strong Christian and I'm so glad the Lord was with him!!!!!

sometimes its ok to speak out(you might be shedding light on a painful subject that someone closes to you struggles with too....anxiety, depression, weight, money). BUT WHEN is it time to hold your tongue? (when do you just sound like your a whiner?) I've had these health issues for years. But if you look at my blog its not a dark or dreary place. Its not a reflection of that. I know of a few other bloggers and throughout the week have had the privilege (through email) to meet a few more, that too have some similar issues, and they too (some) choose not to dedicate their blogs to dwelling on the bad but on the contrary reflecting the good in their life. I'm not saying to put on a mirage, as if your life is peaches and cream but there are just some things that shouldn't be blogged about everyday. Sorry. I know we've all been to "that blog" before where "that person" just goes on and and on about how terrible their life is and this and that when in fact they should be thankful for what they have. I mean do these people not think about the pain that Christ suffered as their typing (constantly complaining)? *ugh* You just keep going back to see WHAT possibly NEXT can they complain about?!?!? Yeah not my place, there is just so many of them out there. you blog how you want. I'm the one thats gone a whole month before and not blogged then filled in the blanks with a cute picture and a one sentence explanation. :-D gotta love those posts. ha haa

As a whole, whether your a Christian, agnostic, an atheist or an alien (I was on a roll with the A's what can I say?)...take care of yourself and those around you. For right now we're all we've got. Take the time to put your own selfish need aside and love one another. Take better care of yourselves and your loved ones and step out side of your comfort zone and help someone in need. Have leftovers and a single neighbor? Take em on over! [psssst....and you don't have to blog about it....we don't need to know your reward will be much greater later down the road] I'm a personal believer in Heaven but for some of you its Karma so do it for your own beliefs, do it for your kids. Do it cause you know that somewhere down the road someone will PayItForward!!!

Please be in prayer....

for a couple of our friends... as of yesterday Rob and his wife Amanda were expecting their fourth, going into labor she felt a bit uneasy. After getting to the hospital and starting the pitocin they couldn't get a heart beat(which surprisingly is NOT uncommon-due to the position of the baby), so they were going to go in vaginally and attach a monitor to the babies head only to find that the baby at 40 weeks had passed. Complications due to a "small" umbilical cord. Is all we were told up until last night.

This is extremely hard for Amanda and Rob, this would have been their 4th little blessing.

[for those of you that know me personally this IS NOT Amanda L***** my best friend that lives in Germany(also married coincidentally to a Robert).] This is a friend of Clints Rob and his wife that I just met this past year. very sweet couple that is having a tremendously hard time grieving and trying to explain to their children how and why this has happened. Please keep them and their children in your thoughts and prayers.

Dear Lord,

Dear Lord,

So far today, God, I've done all right. I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my temper, haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish or over-indulgent. I'm really glad about that.

But in a few minutes...I'm going to get out of bed...and from then on I'm probably going to need ALOT moore help. Please be with me.....

Thank you.

Amen.

:o)

(posted by way of cell phone from.....you guessed it...the cell phone!)

A video for daddy!

Am I the only one that there hubbys are the "enforcer"? I am definitely the parent that has to do any and most all of the physical punishment (time out, spanking) but just me saying "DADDY" makes the kids behave different.

Isn't that crazy? Our 20 month old KNOWS already. She picked up my new reading glasses and I simply said, "Terri give those to mommy." Her response,"NOOOO!!" ::she turns and runs away:: Let me try one more time. "Terri give those to me now." (a little more sternly) ::squeals and runs away:: THEN I say "Daaadddy" She IMMEDIATELY runs back to me and says "heeear mamma"

HOW IS THAT?

Okay your probably gonna think bad of me.....::snickering:: I need to admit something now. We have been living a lie. A long long time ago we set up a camera and video taped Mason. He could've been around 3. We let him watch the video with us. I can't remember what he was doing or had learned how to do at the time but I remember we were FLOORED. I think it was when he learned how to open the fridge and CLIMB up the shelves. ANYWAYS . . .we showed him the video and explained that no matter what your doing SOMEONE is always watching. I've always taught our son about God and trying to teach a 3yo that God is Omnipresent; he knows all, sees all and hears all, all the time was a bit difficult. But he knows and understands this now. (back to the story...) NOW at 5YO Mason thinks still that the house is rigged with mini cameras. IF and WHEN he is being disobedient(typically getting out of bed after daddy leaves to go out or picking on Terri and Kristopher) he will ask me, "Mommy is daddy watching?" My answer is typically "I don't know baby" ::snickering:: SHAME ON ME! WHAT? if it works don't fix it right? WELL Mason has even told our babysitters "Mommy and Daddy might have the cameras on." Upon returning home I will IMMEDIATELY be asked (everytime without fail) "Do you have nanny cams?" ::snickering:: *(with a big cheese eatin grin)* "nooooooo, we don't"

Point of all my rambling.....

Well with me being sick last week Clint had to give ALOT of pep talks. He would call during the day time and talk to Mason to make sure he was being good and helping mommy. Typically he is my bestest little helper. But when your sick you know that is when they want to get roudy. They know that you are more likely to be merciful in your time of need.

So one day last week I decided to get the camera out and TRY to video tape the kids while going to pick up Katherine. NOTE: This is something I do everyday with (typically) three kids. I'm not gonna lie, 2 toddlers and a 5yearold in one back seat for an hour can be a little wild. I like to keep sugar OUT of them all morning and BAIT them with it for the car ride. teee heeeee!!!!!

I must say, on this particular day the kids were really good. I'm pretty sure it was last Wednesday. I think this was when I was still really fatigued and still sick. PLEASE excuse the nose picking halfway thru. Oh and you all KNOW you like my 3:10 to yuma shirt! ;-) (with my pink bra) lol!!!!

I know Mason annnnnd Terri should be learning that they should behave just because they don't want to get daddy mad but its what we should be doing to glorify the Lord as Christians. I need to keep instilling in Mason that he needs to be serving God everywhere, not just at certain places like church or with our family. He need to be aware of God's presence at all times and walk with Him always. :-D Something I could practice more myself.

A Prayer: Heavenly Father, though we cannot see You, You do see us as we walk the path you've laid. You guide us through this maze of sudden turns, large ditches, strange territory, and even the dead ends. Though we may be shaken(bulldozzed) from time to time in the midst of finding our way we are assured that You watch over us. You know our heart’s and You strengthen us as we choose to wakl the path of righteousness. Our hearts are fully committed to You and we look to You, our Father, for all our spiritual, physical, emotional and financial needs. Your continuous presence brings peace to our soul. Amen.

When it Rains it pours!

Saturday I was at a friends house for her stepdaughters birthday.

The day went fairly well...a little hot.

Clint left and while he was gone he received a phone call from his Uncle Kelly.

His cousin Christys longtime boyfriend Rob, was in a motorcycle accident.

Clint went to CMC where Rob was airlifted and called me at 9p.m. to let me know that he had passed.

Later on he found out that after doing 7 blood transfusions Rob, who had lost his leg in the accident had died 30 minutes after arriving at the hospital.

I met Rob about the same time I met Christy, shortly after me and Clint started seeing each other.

I am going to be honest and write EXACTLY what I am thinking and I am not trying to offend anyone.


You see Christy is bipolar. She is on lithium and xanax to deal with everyday life. So this is like a tree falling on top of her. Its crushing her and she doesn't know how to escape.

Rob and Christy were next door neighbors before moving in together so they have known each other for a long time. This accident is tough for the family b/c honestly they never thought anyone could be with Christy for so long. He was great with her. They were with us at the beach this past labor day week. Though neither of them want kids they were great with ours.

Christy is EXTREMEly sweet, but I know that this is sending her to a major low.

When Evelyn (Clint and Christys grandmother) passed away two years ago, Christy had a verrrry hard time dealing with it. That was someone that helped raise her and was there for her whenever she was in need. BUT Rob was the one that helped her through that. They lived together, slept, ate, and breathed together. He was her other half. I am so worried for her.

She only wants Clint right now, b/c he lost his mother. I know that Terry (Clints mom that committed suicide 6 years ago) was a role model to Christy, I just pray that she doesn't go to the extreme like Terry.

I am sorry to keep on posting all of these tragedies on you guys.

But When it rains it pours! I am confident that the Lord will not put more on her than she can take and like I said with Baby Bryson, He does everything to glorify Him!

Pictures of Baby Bryson w/ an UpDate!!

FIRST off I (as well as our family) want to thank everyone that is sending me emails and comments for ALL of your prayers!
There HAS been improvement! No we will not know the amount of damage until he gets older, but there are such things as miracles! God Bless!

*Click Images to enlarge*

Too bad for Clint that I've got a new Boyfriend!!He is TOO CUTE!

Take a deep breath and prepare yourselves...for a big "AWE"!!
then *Click* to enlarge!!

just a lit'l f.y.i.....the thing on the left arm is to secure his IV. that you can see is going up around his back. Josh laughs when Bryson swats it around like he is saying "leave me alone or I'mma hit cha!"

okay so for the update....he WAS going to be allowed in the room from 7-9 BUT when they took him off his feeding tube his Blood sugar dropped. SO they were going to feed him two or three more bottles by mouth to see if it would stabilize.

BUT I did get to go to the ICU and hold him for a while. It was nice to get to see my little brother so comfortable with his new baby. Even in his fragile state.

While I held him I could see the sadness on Joshs face. He picked up Brysons (hospital issued) hat and saw the fresh blood on it. :-( It wasn't much and I was SURPRISED at how much his head had gone down. By looking at him in the pictures you can hardly tell the amount of trama that this poor thing has gone through.

I know it must be hard for them...I couldn't imagine. You would have to drag me away from him.

Soo until tomorrow...good night!

I will add pictures of Mason in the waiting room Monday night by tomorrow. CuTE pictures!!

Wednesdays update on Baby Bryson...

I just got a call from my lit'l brother and he said that they are allowing Bryson to come to the room tonight from 7-9p.m.

They are only allowing 3 family members in the room tonight. SO I will HAVE SOME PICTURES now that he will be in the room!!!!

I am going to try and help Amber and Josh bond with the baby! They are new parents so they don't know how imperative it is for that skin to skin contact.

Amber wants to cloth diaper and be a hip babywearing mamma! I've got to get her a sling and a wrap!!! :-)

Off to clean!! KEEP PRAYING!!!

*******
BTW...off topic but that ticket I got a couple months ago...well I missed court and now I have to hire an attorney and pay MORE in court cost! Grreeeeaaaat! I'm sure CLint will be thrilled!

UPDATE on Baby Bryson.

Okay so its official...I'M in LOVE!!

I got to hold Bryson tonight for a WHOLE HOUR! He likes "give us clean hands"!! I was singing it to him and he just relaxed and went to sleep. They said that he has been sleeping with one eye cracked...UNTIL I held him. AWE!! His loves his auntie! I LOVE him too.

Can you think of that new baby smell? How wonderfully sweet it is!! :'-(

He still has fluid on his brain and his head is still bleeding, but his breathing tubes are out and he is able to be held. Amber and Josh have both had their turns, so has her mom and sister (I hope their evil didn't rub off). Everyone was gone by 6:30 and I stayed with them till 11:15. While she went back to the room and rested I got to stay with Bryson. (Wasn't supposed to, but the RN was SUPER nice!!) I want them in my home so bad. I want to help Josh and AMber the best I can. I know that they will be safe here, and that she will get plenty of rest, and him PLENTY of love.

Keep up the prayers! That there will be no long term damage. Say another prayer that Clint will open up his home them. I know he cares, I just think that he feels that this home isn't equipt for that many people. I hope that he bends for a few weeks at least!

PLEASE read and PRAY!!

I sent this as an email moments ago to Drea and some of my fellow prayer warriors!!!!

I need your prayers. My brother and his girlfriend need your prayers. They had their baby tonight.

I got to the hospital at 7ish and she had BEEN pushing...she had given up. Her epidural wore off hours prior. {Amber is a Christian but her mother and sister aren't.}

I got in there and calmed her and helped her(along with my brother and her aunt) breathe and push for a hour and a half...the baby was down there that long.(she pushed for almost 4 1/2 hours)

He isn't doing well...his brain was compressed so long....the stress on the baby, I can't tell you enough how much I pray that God takes life and fills Brysons lungs. HE NEVER CRIED!!!

They gave us no apgar score before they took him away.

I just got home and called my dad. He has faith that God will protect Bryson and has left him in able hands.

PLEASE PRAY THAT THERE IS NO DAMAGE TO HIS BRAIN. HE IS ON OXYGEN AND STRUGGLING.

I left b/c they wouldn't let him out of the NICU till in the morning.

I actually had Mason with me b/c they told me at 6:00p.m. that she had been pushing and the baby was "crowning". I would have never of brought my son had I known she would be pushing so long. She delivered at 10:20...it is now1:00 and I just got home...yet no call. I am weeping typing this. My baby brother is now a father he doesn't even know what is going on. Neither does Amber.

She had her mom, sister, "friend", aunt, and Josh all in the room. WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE ARE they to yell at her? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am so mad. I am hurting so bad.

as soon as I know something I will let you know.

thank you soooo much

***U P D A T E ***

I talked to my little brother and he said they got Bryson stabilized sometime this morning. He said that they can't hold Bryson till later today though. They said that during the birth, the back of the baby's head split open. He has fluid in head either on his skull or in the brain. The baby and Amber had one of the most DIFFICULT deliveries that I have ever seen. They are taking him right now to get a CAT scan done. I don't think they are giving Josh and Amber full explanations of the severity of the loss of oxygen . (maybe b/c of their young age idk) Maybe b/c they don't want her to get postpartum.

I believe in the sovereignty of God... and nothing happens by accident... theres a reason this happened... may be hard to see now but we have to trust the He will work all things out for the Glory of his kingdom.

thank you for your prayers!!

<3>

What I've Learned Today.

I went to the womens mission meeting at church tonight and as I sat there listening, I found that I learned alot about myself. I listened to the prayer requests of my Christian sisters and I thought the whole time what I could do to help them. Donna asked for prayer for a new member of our churchs son. He is only 11 years old and is going through treatments for cancer. Donnas kids are friends with him and could not understand why he has to lay in a machine for 6 hours today. I thought to myself how hard it must be for him and his family. The question arose if he was terminal or not. I couldn't help to think about myself at that point. I wasn't being selfish, or getting off the topic of this child. I just thought that I really need to go back to work Hospice. I can't tell you how much I loved being with these people and trying to make their last days and their families easier...brighter. I thought about the people that he sees 3-5 days a week in the hospital, I thought that I could be one of those people that could hold him and help him get through his pain. God Bless this family. He can only go through radiation one more time for the rest of his life. The doctors are thinking that it might have to be soon. PLEASE pray that HE can make a way to ease his pain. Pray that God brings some sort of relief and comfort to this family. Please.

OKAY Sorry I had to upset everyone. I will tell you that I DID learn that my "borderline" O.C.D is a sin. WHAT??? We joked about it, but in reality I am "worried and distracted by many things;" But God says that there is "need of only one thing"...HIM. "which will not be taken away from me"!!! (Luke 10:41,42).This was such a topic that Lyndie chose tonight. It really hit me face on. I am worried about all the little things like my linen closet being straight or my cloth diapers being folded the same way...instead of being like Mary and focus on loving God; to do this one thing is to choose the better, to be a disciple of Jesus.

What else did I learn? That parenting can be full of trials/tribulations. But being able to share the bitter and the sweet with my fellow Christian sisters makes my journey easier. Being able to go and laugh at a simple face that my daughter makes might help bring a smile to the face of someone tomorrow!

WHAT ELSE DID I LEARN????
toooooo knit! Thats right Aura (Dreas mommy). I did it! ARE you proud?? I know you wanted to teach me. But I would only stress you out! ::snickering:: Well not me but the kids! Well I would stress Cliff out. Terri climbing the stairs and inevitably falling right back down them. Then Mason would probably be swimming in the fish pond. :-) I know your probably just happy for me. You are so kind! So here is what I started with....
Here is where I am now. Yes I know its is long. everyone did a short one and started on their scarfs. I am a little more ...(whats the word?)...rambunctious. I want to make the worlds ugliest blanket!!! My first knitting session and I am talking throws already? yeash! I definitely have high standards! I need to keep you updated. I also need to get off her and start reading my new book for Bible study, its Lies Women Believe. By Nancy DeMoss.

I just wanted to say again, how wonderful it is to get together with other Christian women and jion in on such warm fellowship! I strongly suggest to all of you out there to join in and receive support and find friendship as you share your journey through marriage, parenting, and life with Christ.