Katja said bounce back to blogging!

While on facebook this morning another fellow blogger and store owner Katja Presnal, mentioned that she is doing a live web show today at 2 p.m. EST and you can watch it live here on my blog!


She will be giving away 5 ~~~> $25 e.l.f. Cosmetics gift cards during the show.

The first gift card will go to the person who guesses the SUPER STAR that Katja saw in NYC yesterday. One of the remaining 4 gift cards will also go to a blogger who blogs about her show. Be sure to visit Skimbaco Lifestyle for more details and tune in on Katja’s blog, Snazl, or the e.l.f. Cosmetics promo page at 2pm EST for the party!

Time to Break the Silence!?!

...even though I can't get into details. *eh making promises for others selfish needs STINKS*

I just wanted to say that I'm alive and well. For the most part that is. ::smiles:: I'm still dealing with my endo pain daily, and the migraines come and go....but other than that I'm so blessed to be where I'm at right now. I'm sure theres at least ONE person whose reading this rolling his their eyes, but my life in the past .....end-feb, march, april and may...has taken a dramatic leap. I've moved. Let me rephrase, me and the children have moved. (won't say where) ;-) Along with some minor living adjustments I'm on a new road. I'm not sure day to day if it's gonna be good or bad from the reciprocating end....but I lift my hands up and just ask that we get through this as easily as possible.

I think this transition has been hardest on....him ME. The kids are absolutely in every way fine. More than fine b.c now that they know they can play both sides. ::snickering:: I'm teasing of course. Mason and Terri in whatever crowd, in whatever house, in whatever room are going to be loved. Regardless whats happening. THAT is my main purpose in life.

Don't get me wrong, boy they test me, because they CAN Like more than before. Children really do need a positive male role model in their life to help guide them. I've always said this and can't say it enough, WE as mothers are much too merciful on our children at times. When daddy, or paw-paw walk in a room all of a sudden its little halos back on top of their heads. Meanwhile I now that I'm the one thats with them 6 days a week and has to do the punishing. Oh what you thought I was going to say that I don't yell? psssft! W.E. !! I'm the queen. ha haa. I've always tried to do that whole I'm in charge voice tone. M & T don't even pause. .. .they're like yeah ::throw in boo boo face:: we'll get outta this trouble in ohhh.....5 seconds. grrrrrr... IF THEY weren't so darn CUTE!!!!

anywho. I'm here. alive and well! ;-)
most recent pic of the kids...

sitting in a river on our trip to Mt.Bervard.

My Dads Progress...

I guess its been a long week. A really long week. After Tuesdays events and taking my dad to the Hospital I didn't think it could get much worse.

I took last week off from all blogging to motivate my dad. (w/ the exception my weekly review on SIMPLE- along with a giveaway) But I wanted to get him going in a new direction. Hes just been all over the place lately. Since last September he's given up all red meat, pork and most salt intake. But then again he's smoking more....so I'm at a loss there. ugh ::sigh:: I did however get him OUT of the living room this week and into HIS room. You might be wondering what I'm talking about. ummm... well my father with all back issues has for the past SEVERAL years slept on the couch. Which is worse on him in the long run but hes more comfortable there. About 3 or 4 years ago when I was working 50/60 hour shifts (Hospice) I along with my big brother went in and got him one of those craftmatic adjustable beds in a king size. Too bad the only thing he uses it for is too lay his clean clothes on while he folds them. He sure is anal about how he folds his clothes. Regardless he's now in a bed, which is one step in the right direction.

I went with him on Thursday morning to his follow up Doctor appointment. Checking everything after the hospital...

to make a long story REALLY short...my Daddies Dr "whatever" thats 30 years old and wet behind the ears. He looks at my daddy whose been cut open 6 times and is 47 and I guess he thinks my fathers one of those ppl that just likes to take pain medicine. (WRONG! He takes LESS than I do) But this Dr is new to the practice and when my fathers original Dr left this is who he got stuck with. Someone that walks into a room, doesn't introduce himself to my dad, just looks at his chart and says "I don't prescribe pain meds so if thats what your here for then I'm sorry." (My dad told me this and I BOILED) But I took him to the doctor Thursday Morning and me with my degree looked at the Dr about the 2nd time he interrupted my father and I jumped his butt. Ohhhhh. I was pissed. First off every time my dad goes to the Dr. the CMA NEVER reads his blood pressure accurately. For a WHILE now I read it after my dad goes in as well as bought him an automatic cuff for his birthday last year, and EVERY SINGLE TIME his bp is high. Even after he's cut his diet. Thursday after I got ahold of that Dr we left with blood pressure meds. (FINALLY years too late) pain pills (Dr DID eventually give him to him b.c he Rarely asks and his original Dr always gave him the same Rx. ), Lyrica for his convulsions, ...and a air mattress... all this from a doctor who looked at my father the first time and said "I don't believe in medication I want to send you to a pain management clinic" WHICH they pump you FULL of pain meds!! idiot. sorry I had to vent. I just love my dad and hate to see him walked all over.

Oh and BELIEVE I will be back. He was in the ER two weeks ago and STILL can't see fully out of his right eye. He has a 30% curve to his spine, 9 bulging disks and 6 pinched nerves among other things. He will not be overlooked.

CAn I add that my dad walked out of there so proud of his little girl for yelling at that Dr. Throwing all his medical terminology RIGHT back in his face, and by the time we left had him asking me...."anything else? are you sure? are you sure? IF you NEED TO CALL ME DO SO FOR ANYTHING!!!!!!"

:O) I usually don't loose my temper but DO NOT mess with my family.

Oh and the end of the week was even better....grrrr!!!

Praying for My Father

I had to rush my father to the ER Tuesday morning. I thought he was having a stroke. My grandmother called me and told me that something was wrong with him, he was very confused and he couldn't see or stand. When I got to the house he was in the fetal position on the couch, he kept saying "I don't know whats wrong, I couldn't remember your name or your number, help me...help me"

I tried to get him to squeeze my hand to signify if he had lost use in his hands (he said he couldn't see out of one eye and one hand was curled up {a sign of stroke}) but he wouldn't acknowledge me. I got him up, and rushed him to the ER. (my grandmother screamed at me when I tried to call for an ambulance--shes insane--my father doesn't have insurance so she thought about the COST UGH) when I got to the ER the nurse asked him the date, the year, where he was...he looked around and all he could say was that he was "with Elizabeth and that he was ok". When they got him back he kept asking me where he was and what was going on. He was crying in pain. Literately CRYING...screaming practically. It was so terrible.HIS EKGs and CAT scans showed that it was the onset of a stroke, that he had previous "activity" (like he had had minor strokes or heart attacks already in the past and not known about them) but that morning he had an anxiety attack that was brought on by the extreme amount of pain that he lives with ...daily. They ended up giving him 8 mg of morphine and 2 ativan. [morphine is distributed depending on weight and pain in doses between 1-4 mg. so he had the maximum both times.] He was in so much pain. I just sat there beside him and held him and cried. It was so sad. He at times didn't even know I was in the room with him. He would talk to me as if I were a stranger.

He is fine now. I suppose. I mean he is still weak, really tired, pale and extremely confused about the other day. He only remembers coming home and staying with me. (I brought him home to my house that night to stay) :-(

I've spent the past couple days with him at his house trying to keep an eye on him, making sure he's eating (he's lost all of his appetite) and not having to do too much. Also the kids being around him keeps him so happy.

praying.

IKEA comes to Charlotte

I know I've mentioned that I have anxiety attacks. Well Saturday at IKEA is not idea in my situation. Had it not been for the overwhelming amounts of things that I fell in love with then I'm pretty sure I'd been much worse off.

First off we lucked up and got parking 4 spots from the entrance. sweeeet! Well once we got in the IKEA store we were pointed to a "childrens fun place". If you've never been to IKEA I just have to say that whoever created this classed in "fun zone" KNEW what they were doing. You can drop you child(ren) off for ONE hour. They give you a buzzer (similar to restaurant buzzers) in case of an emergency or if your just having too much fun shopping. There are height requirements, minimum 36" (and fully potty trained) and a maximum of 54". Terri was about an inch or two over, and yeah we all know fully potty trained for ages. The couple behind Clint and myself asked "is she 4?" We both kind of grinned...."no she's 2 1/2" As their jaws dropped we just said yeah we know we get it all the time. Terri has the long hair (very deceiving for her age) shes really tall (daddy is 6'4") and she speaks very well. So after giving our rugrats the boot we went up the escalator.

The whole shopping experience is much different than a typical store. You go to the showroom first look touch, even try out any and everything; then if you see something you like you get the number off the tag and then you can go and either pick it up your self or have someone get it for you. (Purchase items downstairs...a whole next floor of shopping.) CRAZY I KNOW.

Well my first mistake was that we went against traffic. How were we supposed to know? We were instantly overwhelmed. We of course started at the kids toys/playroom/furnishings. I felt bad that all I kept saying was "I wan I wan I wan" I don't think I finished the entire I WANT. I don't think my sweety minded one bit b.c he was right there beside me the entire time thinking how good this would look or that here or there in the kids rooms. NOW I understand why when you enter they have you go through the living room, office, bedding areas before the kids stuff. (Once you become a parent you will completely neglect our own needs just to make sure our children have that one thing that will keep them occupied, or that awesome new something to make their room that much cooler.)

Well...heres where the anxiety comes in...We moved out of the kids section and the traffic started. Oh boy, I felt like I was floating. NOT in a good way. I was fuzzy headed, nauseous, clammy. It was terrible.

I can't tell you how happy I was to see the exit. I love this place and will surely be going back, just NOT ON A SATURDAY! When we went to pick the kids up 10 minutes early...they were the only two kids in the place sitting at a table coloring. I was so happy they weren't the ones swinging around like crazy monkeys. Not that I would much mind, thats the point of being a kid right? I did find out that Terri took her pants off...she wanted to lay down and watch a movie on all the pillows and she hates wearing pants to sleep. :-/ OKAY so not the best scenario but at least Mason was there to rat her out I mean help her get her pants up. (The lady said she heard Mason saying "NO NO SISSY PULL YOUR PANTS UP" so she got her before she got them fully off.)

What fun!

Afterwards we went to Osaka and ate Sushi and Miso Soup....(the Hibachi steak and shrimp got packed up to come home with us.) When I say we ate Sushi YES my kids love it. Crazy huh? Mason will ask as soon as we walk in if he can have a California roll. tee hheeee...Then he ate HALF of my Philly Roll and Terri munched out the Spicy Tuna.

Can I just add that we LOVE OSAKA!

Follow Your Heart-A Small Taste of The Love Dare

WHY Is Following My Heart Not Enough?

I have been reading a book called The Love Dare. It is from the new movie Fireproof. I really want to share a portion of this book that has completely moved me.
"Whatever you pour your time, money and energy into will draw your heart."

HE WHO TRUSTS IN HIS OWN HEART IS A FOOL, BUT HE WHO WALKS WISELY WILL BE DELIVERED. [Proverbs 28:26]

Whats Wrong With Following My Heart?
It's Foolish. The world says "Follow your heart!" This is the philosophy of new age gurus, self-help seminars, and romantic pop songs. Because it sounds romantic and noble, its sells millions of records/books. The problem is that following your heart usually means chasing after whatever feels right at the moment whether or not it actually is right. It means throwing caution and conscience to the wind and pursuing your latest whims and desires regardless of what good logic and counsel are saying.

Proverbs 23:17 Do not let your heart envy sinners yet we struggle to "keep up with the Jones'" - or we allow our daughters to wear "what Britneys' wearing" (venting sorry) I'm sooo at fault here(self admitted sinner raising hand!!)..BUT I'm not exactly pushing the mini on my 2 year old, but nonetheless I must look at myself in the mirror each day and know the sins I commit and WHO I must answer to.

This book goes on to answer the question...

Why is Following My Heart Not Enough?
Because our hearts are so subject to CHANGE and so utterly untrustworthy, the Scriptures communicate a much stronger message than "follow your heart." The Bible instructs you to LEAD YOUR HEART. This means to take full responsibility for its condition and direction. Realize that you do have control over where you heart is. You have been given the power by GOD To take your heart off one thing and to set it on something else. {verses in the Bible that communicate a message of leading your heart: Prvbs 23:17, Prvbs 23:19, Prvbs 23:26, 1Kings 8:61, John 14:27, James 4:8, James 5:8, Ecc 10:2 ...}


in a nutshell...(for those of you reading this like what in the world? {read it twice you might "get it"} You see that new pair of shoes that just came out...you HAVE to have them...you LOVE them....YOU WANT them...you NEEEEEED them...but at what cost will you go for them to be yours? WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE?) I personally have to spend more time in prayer, and focusing on whats here right beside me now...tweedle dee and tweedle doo. What are you going to focus on?

(portions of this blog post were copied from "The Love Dare" written by Stephen & Alex Kendrick)